Hamburger Mary's

CIRQUE SAYS...

The Vanessa!


the patty 5.9
the bun 7.5
the fixin's 7.6
the sides 7.8
total package 6.8

accessibility 7.4
the service 8.2
cleanliness 7.1
the price 6.1
"it" factor 5.5

TOTAL 72

CIRQUE TEAM
Hamburger Mary's (Map It!) is the burger place with an identity crisis. From Hamburger Mary's to Universal Grille and back again, hopefully the new (old) name and renovated interior are here to stay. As a recognizable spot to hang out with a diverse group of friends, Hamburger Mary's hits a home run. As a burger joint, it strikes out. Mostly, the burger is overpriced. You'll pay well over ten bucks for an average burger and decent sides (the onion rings were great). Also, request your burger to be cooked less well done than you prefer. Those who ordered medium rare were served medium well, and those who ordered medium well were served a burnt piece of meat. The service was great, and the atmosphere is fun (especially once renovations are complete), but the overpriced burger probably isn't worth a visit.

BRAD
What’s the expression that horrible VP candidate used in the election? Something about a bulldog being a bulldog even with lipstick? I think that works for Hamburger Mary’s. They throw a bunch of super good fixins on their mediocre burger, slap in a killer bun, and it’s still….just mediocre. If you like decoupage, you’ll love this place. The tables are shellacked with it.

LEAH
I often go downtown for business lunches, and there's no good place to grab a quick lunch in that area, but Hamburger Mary’s is by far the best possible option.

STEVE
One of my least favorite burgers on the tour. My patty was burnt, and the toppings couldn't hide the charred flavor. The burger was sloppy and way overpriced. Any place that charges over ten bucks for a burger needs to get over themselves, especially when they serve slop.

EMILY
Hamburger Mary’s burger was good but not amazing. Mary’s is a nice (re)addition to downtown, and I’m glad it's back. While the burger doesn’t stack up next to a lot of our other tour stops, I would recommend it if you happen to be downtown and catch a sudden case of burger fever. The afternoon drink prices were great, and my mimosa was delicious. Welcome back Mary!

JASON
I used to frequent Mary’s back before it closed. I remember loving the burgers and onion rings. The onion rings are still really good, but my burger was pretty weak this time around. They claim that the patty had never been frozen, but I’m not convinced. I ordered mine medium-rare, and it came out well done. I was excited about the drink prices listed on the sign out on the sidewalk ($3 bloodies, $2 mimosas), but I was quickly disappointed. The mimosas were strong and decent, but my bloody was possibly the worst I’ve ever had. It had way too much, way too cheap vodka in it. Oh yeah, and I was being swarmed with fruit flies the entire time I was eating. On a positive note, our waitress was super nice and did a great job of explaining the menu. I think Mary’s is great for downtown, and I’m glad its back. Maybe I just ordered the wrong kind of meat.